Biggest Regret

Biggest Regret

We’ve all done something we’ve regretted, but what is your biggest regret?

Biggest Regret

Sometimes I sit around in my bed thinking about life. A few weeks ago I was thinking about what my biggest regret was. It took a while, but I finally pinpointed the decision I regretted most. Thing is, that decision is also the thing that made my life what it is today. So, what was this decision?

Not finishing my A-levels.

Why do I regret it?

Since I left 6th form I sometimes find myself wishing I knew more about certain topics. I wish I still remembered how to spontaneously speak Spanish, I wish I still remembered the physiological/psychological process of getting anxious and I wish I my brain was still active enough to do a mathematical calculation at a healthy speed. I don’t miss Chemistry, not one bit. And let’s not even talk about critical thinking. The fact that I landed myself a job without these qualifications doesn’t really matter to me, I want them for me. (Although getting a job with them might be easier if I had them).

Why do I wish I’d finished them?

Well, I was halfway there so another year for the qualifications, an extra year with my friends (and to leave when everyone is naturally leaving), the monetary reward promised by my Dad as well as actually having the qualifications and knowledge.

But it’s not so simple.

If I finished my A levels I’d have never have moved to London, studied Music Business and found what I wanted to do in life. You could argue I would have done it all a year later, but that teacher has left now so I wouldn’t have had the same experience. I wouldn’t have built my blogging portfolio in the same way, which is important for two reasons. One being I would have a shit portfolio and the second being that blogging is how I met my boyfriend (who incidentally went to the college that I wouldn’t have experienced in the same way a year later, when he’d have left).

That decision is my biggest regret, but it also lead me down a new path where I experienced so many new things and if I’d not made it my life would be completely different now and I’d lose all the good things I gained from making the decision. At the time it was exactly what I wanted, so now it’s just one of those things I’m going to have to live with.

@AyshBanaysh